Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Getting a win in a race...

This will most likely never happen for me.  Not because I do not want to win or due to a lack of competitive nature. 

Ask Bella how competitive I am, and she can tell you a multitude of stories....Her favorite story to share is how I take something small and innocuous, her gently tossing a little snow towards me, and me starting a nuclear snow meltdown on her.  I think by the time my snow stopped flying her way, there was a 3 square mile area bare of snow (other than her small spot).

I will most likely never win a race due to the violent nature of sprinting.  Violent you ask, yes violent.  Check out the following clips, and I think you will get an idea.
about 12 seconds in, right side of screen


                                        about 10 seconds in, starts on right...take whole screen
           

                                        lots of fighting for position, crash at about 40 seconds

In the closing kilometers of a race, teams and individuals fight for positioning.  There is bumping, shouldering, sometimes hand pushing, and bikes touching.  If lucky, they do not crash during this hectic time period.  Oh, do not forget that the pros do all of this while going nearly 55-60 kph (34-37 mph).  When the actual sprint begins, pros can go upwards of 73 kph (45 mph).

I have this interesting complex, which I deal with on a daily basis...it is typically called the survival complex.  When big, mean, scary people come near me, I turtle up on the ground and pray they do not see me.  I use this same trait during racing, and I have yet to find myself involved in a crash during a sprint.

Another reason I will not win, due to sprinting, is that there really is no reward for risking my well being.  I will never be a pro (though looking at my amazing physique you might think pro) and I do not get any money for placing (aside from random acts of kindness, still waiting folks).  I know that winning would be an awesome feat, and that I could endlessly brag about how well I did in the race.  I also know this is in direct conflict with my competitive nature, but survival is important.

The last reason that I will not win during a sprint is the most basic...I really am not that fast.  There are people like Mark Cavendish  (blazing FASSSSSTTTTTTT), Tyler Farrar (FASSSTTTT), and others.  There are animals that qualify too...Cheetah (seriously fast) and my neighbors chihuahua (that sucker is sneaky fast, also starred in Taco Bell commercials...not really).  Then there is me.  I think the only man or beast that fears my burst of speed is the common garden slug...maybe even the two toed sloth.


This season, there have been two sprints that I have actually been a participant.  The first had quite a lot of room, so I could choose my line and not get too close to other riders.  The second was an up hill sprint with only 11 people involved.  Neither sprint resulted in me winning, and luckily there was no crashing. 

I do hope to get a win sometime in the next decade, but I will also be just fine without...So long as I do not get inolved in a crash similar to the ones above.

1 comment:

  1. And to think I was going to dub you the Math Missile! Alas...

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